Matamoros, Mexico: Washington, D.C.:

Sunday, April 3, 2011

How to Enjoy A Weekend

Step 1: Leave work promptly at 5pm on Friday afternoon. Make sure that when you leave work, you really leave work. Promise yourself that you won't do anything related to your job or your daily Monday to Friday routine once you get home.

Step 2: Receive a great gift from a great friend sent via old-fashioned snail mail.

Step 3: Ride your bicycle a few blocks over to the public park to enjoy watching the annual Motorcycle festival held in your local town. Make sure you're there to watch the Esfera de Muerte, or Sphere of Death, and marvel at how these people don't die every few seconds.

Step 3b: Check out the videos I took of said esfera de muerte. The first one features two riders at the same time, the second showcases one rider and two girls standing in the middle.

Step 4: Watch a great foreign film documentary about the Mexican justice system. Enjoy the fact that you're honing your language skills, learning about the country in which you live, and being entertained, all at the same time.

Step 5: Get at least eight hours of sleep between Friday and Saturday.

Step 6: Wake up slightly early on Saturday to attend an eco-themed bike ride with your boss and coworkers from your city to the local beach, totaling about 18.5 miles. Be amused by the fact that the local police motorcycles have car batteries strapped to the back to power their lights/sirens. Be amazed at the guy riding next to you on what looks like a bike straight out of the 1980s. Feel sad that he's doing way better than you are even though you have a new bike and are at least 20 years younger.

Step 7 (optional): Be interviewed on the beach by local Mexican journalists because you work for the US Consulate General. Make a few comments about the importance of taking care of the environment, congratulate the cyclists, and compliment your host city.

Step 8: Return from the bike ride with tired legs but feeling refreshed and invigorated.

Step 9: Take a nap. Or, depending on your location, a siesta.

Step 10: Be rudely awakened from your nap by the pain you feel in your stomach because of the tacos you ate at the finish line of the bike race, which were of slightly questionable quality to begin with. Rush to the bathroom and deal with Montezuma's Revenge for about 30 minutes.

Step 11: String up your hammock between the two big columns on your back porch.

Step 12: Lie in your hammock for three hours reading a nice book, listening to the birds in springtime, and taking another nap (or, siesta) in the beautiful late-afternoon 76ºF partly-cloudy weather with a slight but constant cool breeze.

Step 13: Water your garden.

Step 14: Go over to your friend's house to play a friendly game of poker and to enjoy good food and good company for the evening, losing only $7.

Step 15: Sleep at least eight hours, but pleasantly wake up 2 hours before your alarm feeling refreshed and fully awake.

Step 16: Enjoy a bowl of your favorite cereal while listening to good music and watching the birds outside.

Step 17: Attend a church of your choosing, if that's your thing.

Step 18: Go grocery shopping, get your hair cut, and run a few errands.

Step 19: Spend more time in your hammock out back.

Step 20: Cook a delicious dinner which will also provide some good leftovers for this week.

Step 21: Enjoy said dinner while Skyping with friends from home.

Step 22: Catch up on a missed episode of The Daily Show, or whatever your favorite show may be.

Step 23: Read a little more before going to bed.

Step 24: Go to bed slightly early - not so early that you seem like a grandpa, but not too late that you're reliving your college days.

Step 25: Dream of what a beautiful, relaxing, wonderful, peaceful, enjoyable weekend you just had. Life is good.

Until next time...peace.


  1. Sphere of Death? You gotta love the attraction name! Sounds like a nail biting section to a fantastic weekend. Hope your Monday doesn't squash the feeling.

  2. Sounds awesome! Glad you had such a great weekend.

  3. A: i could totally hear the AC trademarked "Oh My God" in the first video.

    B: i am jealous of your weekend.

  4. Wow, as tempting as the beach might be, I'm not sure I'd leave that hammock all weekend. We had some amazing weather in Iowa this weekend and I was able to work in the yard. My bees were buzzing around anxious for the clover to blossom. My cats were hovering at the screen door wanting to run in the grass outside. Spring feels good....glad your weekend went well.

  5. Paddy: yeah.. that was because the guy going around the thing took off his helmet and put on a hat.... while flying around the SPHERE OF DEATH. So freaking dangerous.